A lot of people say web logs, known as blogs to people in the “know,” are revolutionizing the way ideas are transmitted. With merely an internet connection and a computer, anyone in the world can share their insights with the masses. Some even say that blogs will one day become so popular that they will replace forms of media like newspapers and TV as the number one source for news. No doubt, blogs are amazing. But the important question is…

Can a blog defeat a velociraptor?

Are you kidding me? Velociraptors can open doors, so they definitely know how to work the web. I have on good authority that velociraptors run realultimatepower.net, wwujd.com, and Google. I’m pretty sure Maddox is a velociraptor too. All velociraptors will need to do is assume their ultimate hunting formation, and it would be all over pretty fast. The blog would read like this:

Blah, blah, blah, electoral college, blah, blah, blah, affirmative action, blah, blah, blah, Joe Lieberman doesn’t like video games. Oh look, a velociraptor in front of me. No worries, I’ll bore it to death. This is what I don’t like about the fiscal plan unde

At that point, two velociraptors would appear out of nowhere from the sides and eat the blog. Velociraptors always win. Velociraptor throws rock, melts scissors and eats paper. A blog wouldn’t stand a chance.

I'll send you back to the essence